Earlier this week, I had the opportunity to sit down and FaceTime with my good friend Maya Dub. Like a few other people in my circle, Maya is not a huge fan of me putting her business out there on social media. Suffice it to say that we met as RAs, that we once held a muffin war and helped plan a prison party, that we adventured in New York City for a summer, and that she never left that place. Some friends are more like siblings. So it is with Maya Dub.
Maya and I are both important people who lead tremendously busy lives. When the stars align and allow us a moment to converse, then, we waste no time with niceties. Immediately we steep ourselves in a series of audacious, unapologetic debates and critiques on the state of the world and the meaning of life. We speak as though we are proclaiming the secrets of the universe, as though we are on a pulpit delivering our personal brand of wisdom unto the masses. It’s a rich experience, and, every now and then, one of us comes up with something good.
This week, in line with a series of arguments regarding the nature of our generation, Maya and I found ourselves discussing the millennial tendency to swap majors 37 times before graduating. Shaking her head, eyes wide with conviction, Maya Dub broke ground on some truth: “We need to learn to put a period at the end of our decisions.”
Damn. That is good stuff. Standing on this side of a job search, a job search that had my fingers shaking as I deliberated about the right move forward, I have felt the struggle of putting a period at the end of my decision. And I see the freeing absolution of choosing to do so.
That night, just as I was wrapping up a late-night project and preparing to head to bed, I received a text from a different friend in a distant land. “Can you talk?” it said. I could.
And we did. As it turns out, one of my friends is standing at an impasse in the form of a very tough decision. If he closes a chapter now, he may wonder where it goes. If he keeps moving through it as is, he may spend another year feeling stuck. Back and forth, we discussed the pros and cons of both. The importance of deciding for oneself, not for others. Finally, I told him: “My friend told me tonight that, whatever we decide, we need to put a period at the end of our decisions.” The phone was quiet for a moment. Then, “Yeah.”
Tonight, my friend told me he is close to putting a period at the end of his decision. That is phenomenal news, regardless of his decision. People doubt us less when we speak with confidence. With decisiveness. I am certain we doubt ourselves less, too. Imagine the impact of choosing to live with certainty of self. With inner strength. With bravado.
Friends, readers, audience of the Wise Maya Williams: Put a period at the end of your decisions.
michael king 