the “if i could change” project.

The “When I Knew” project has been nothing short of inspirational, which has a lot to do with the courage and honesty of the people who have chosen to share their stories and experiences. When there is a safe space for authenticity, I think, we find the most compelling and legitimate versions of ourselves emerge.

And, so it is, that I introduce the next project. This one is focused on the question of, if LGBT+ individuals had the choice to live the life of a completely, authentically heterosexual-and-cisgender person, would they?

The question came to me when I heard a gay peer reason that his sexuality was not a choice, as “who would choose this?” I began to explore that question myself: Would I choose a different story for myself if I could?


If you are LGBT+ and thinking of contributing, here are the questions I am curious to hear the answers to:

  1. When you first realized you might be different, what was your initial reaction? Did you want to change? Did you feel “normal?”¬†
  2. If any, what steps or strategies did you adopt to try to change? What was that experience like?
  3. If you could change your life to the life of a completely heterosexual-and-cisgender person, would you? Why or why not?

These can be submitted to me via Facebook message, Twitter message, or e-mail. I will post them anonymously as soon as I can. Hopefully, as with the “when-I-knew” narratives, they will inspire empathy and courage among the people reading them.

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