soundtrack to a chapter.

At some point, I tweeted, stop adding songs to the playlist. Let it live and breathe in its current form. One day, many days after this chapter has ended, open it again, hit play, lie your head back, and bask.

Music has a way of following us around all day. Headphones pump music into our eardrums, granting soundtracks to our commutes. In the car, we drum on our steering wheels and sing along, settling down at stoplights. We curate playlists for the people we fall in love with, passing songs along in social media messages, love letters in their own right. Then, in a moment we aren’t expecting, a song we’ve forgotten catches us off-guard. Our faces go gentle, eyes go distant. Memories pull themselves from the shelf, unfurl before our eyes, beg our hands to brush over them.

My past four years have been marked by milestones. Coming out, moving to Muncie, navigating my first heartbreak, falling in love again, the Supreme Court marriage equality ruling, adventures in New York and Portland and Nashville and Orlando and New Orleans and Minneapolis, navigating a heartbreak I didn’t ask for, beginning again, finding courage in new corners, showing up for myself, deciding on a next chapter. Memories still in living, breathing color, but already beginning to gray.

What follows is my best attempt to gather the songs that have been with me through all of that. Sat with me on drives on rainy afternoons, come with me for runs under the summer sun, danced with me on nights with friends and lovers, met my tears with gentle palms.

Consider it another form of telling this story. Sixty-five songs to stand in for words.

_\.. /

Summer 2014 // Coming Out & Moving to Muncie //

Wherever This Goes // The Fray
Luck // American Authors
Brave // Sara Bareilles
Pumpin Blood // NONONO
Pompeii // Bastille

Fall 2014 // Navigating Heartbreak //

Be Still // The Killers
The Wolves & The Ravens // Rogue Wave
Gravity // Sara Bareilles
I Wanna Get Better // Bleachers
All Will Be Well // Gabe Dixon Band

Winter 2014 // Falling in Love Again //

Like Real People Do // Hozier
Blank Space // Taylor Swift
Heartbeats // José Gonzalez
Say You Love Me // Jessie Ware
Lay Me Down (Acoustic) // Sam Smith
The First Day of My Life // Bright Eyes
Cassiopeia // Sara Bareilles

Spring/Summer 2015 // Brave Unknown //

Sissy That Walk // RuPaul
Shots // Imagine Dragons
Beware the Dog // The Griswolds
Express Yourself // Diplo ft. Nicky Da B
Good Intentions // The Chainsmokers ft. Bullysongs
Out of the Woods // Taylor Swift
I Lived // OneRepublic

Fall 2015 – Spring 2016 // Good and Bright //

Wildest Dreams // Taylor Swift
Giants in the Sky // Daniel Huttlestone (‘Into the Woods’)
Young Volcanoes // Fall Out Boy
Unpack Your Heart // Phillip Phillips
80’s Films // Jon Bellion